Random Conversations

Who Am I?

Who Am I?

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A conversation with myself

I’m stuck. I’ve been preparing for a Substack launch, and I have been trying to write the piece that will introduce me to readers. Unfortunately, words are not coming, thoughts are not flowing.

Who am I? It occurs to me that I rarely talk about myself. Maybe that is part of the issue, but certainly not all.

A Recent Conversation

Earlier this month, a dinner conversation made me ponder. I sat next to someone I’ve known for a couple of years now. Our interactions have always been pleasant and light – the conversational equivalent of talking about the weather.

During dinner, however, my acquaintance was very curious. She had so many questions – starting with my childhood. I was comfortable sharing my responses and readily did so, but I finally had to wonder why I was of so much interest. That would have been a good question to ask her.

I’m really nothing special – or, at least, no more special than anyone else. Maybe she can better answer the question of who I am.

Indulging in my Shyness

I am a shy person and have always been one. In high school and college, I was told I was aloof. (Ouch!) In truth, I was afraid to introduce myself to people. Once I did, what would I say? And what if they rejected me?

Dating in my twenties, I stumbled upon the realization that many of the men I met tended to be perfectly happy talking about themselves.

I would let my curiosity lead me to ask questions, which opened a conversation of sorts. In a lull, I’d ask another question. At the end of the evening, I would have shared very little about myself.

Those men quickly passed through my life. Mutual curiosity tends to lead to a very different outcome.

Is this lack of comfort in waxing lyrical about myself contributing to my feeling of being stuck? Possibly.

The Multiplicity of Who We Are

What I realize as I write is that I am not comfortable defining who I am. I am not this or that. I am this AND that – and more. As are we all.

What if we answer the question, “Who am I,” from the perspective of all that we are? For example, what we love about our life, what brings us joy, what our dreams are. That would open an amazing conversation.

Who we are colors all that we do. It drives how we perform at work, at play, with each other. That is so much more interesting to consider than presenting one aspect. It is also more true.

And just maybe, that is the key to getting unstuck today. I had been trying to define or label myself, and that stopped me cold. We are all so much more than a label.

Moving Forward

Who are you – you in the fullness of your multiplicity? What a wonderful question to consider!

Photo by Joshua Gresham on Unsplash

Cathy Joseph is the author of the Random Conversations blog and is currently seeking representation for her book, The Art of Having a Delicious Conversation.

© 2022 Cathy Joseph. All rights reserved.

4 thoughts on “Who Am I?”

  1. Well, my dearest Cathy, it is SO EASY to define you! You are THE BEST! You are generous, considerate, joyous, and always…always…there for anyone who needs you. More than that, not a single person could spend time with you and not be better for the interaction. I’ve been to multiple colleges, gotten a boat-load of certifications, had incredible opportunities in my life, but SO MANY of my deepest life lessons came from spending time with you! I guess I’ve never told you that, but I KNOW with all my heart there are many more folks like me out there who feel the same way! YOU, CATHY JOSEPH, make the world a better place for
    because of you!

    1. I am speechless. Thank you, Mary! One of the gifts in hearing from you, my dear friend, is that you have known me over 25 years, and have seen me up close and personal in my multiplicity. I so appreciate the comments you shared – and I so appreciate YOU!

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